Wanna make a kid really, really happy?

Give the kid a nutcracker.

Not the decorative Christmas-kind of nutcracker, the kind on which the famous ballet with the Sugar Plum Fairies was based. Do not give them that kind because they will instantly break it and you’ll end up using Crazy Glue far too often and to little avail:



I mean a good, old-fashioned metal nut cracker. Like this:


Then buy a bag of mixed nuts, on special now for $2.99 at Shoprite.



Insane joy and revelry will ensue.

At bedtime, when we tried to wrest the nutcracker from Prmo’s compulsively cracking hands, he actually said, “I’ll just take the nutcracker with me and crack nuts in bed.”

My kid is a nut nut.