Tuesday, September 29, 2009

My daughter talks like William Burroughs

Its stream of consciousness word association all the time with her. So, either like William Burroughs or the crazy pregnant lady in that commercial who talks like a Google search engine and freaks out the nice woman in yoga class. You know the commercial I mean.

Here is an excerpt from one of Seconda’s monologues:

“I like Dragon Tales, you can’t feed a dragon because it will bite you, a dragon will bite you right on the head and it is so FEROCIOUS, and my dog is ferocious and my dog will bite you and my dog will not bite a dragon but do you want to see my dog bite you, Mommy, right on your head? When I grow up I’m gonna get a dog and a cat and chew gum but you can NOT chew the wrapper because that is paper and if you gonna chew the wrapper than you gonna get TIME OUT. Time out is where I got my bloody finger from the air conditioner in my room and I was cryyyyyyyyying and I was so sad and you said ‘Why you crying, honey?’ And I said, ‘I got a bloody finger’ and then you gave me a Band-Aid and it had Snoopy and Snoopy’s a dog who can bite you on the head and he likes to drink milk and my brother likes milk and I want some milk milk MILK FOR THE MORNING CAKE!”

If her brother starts to say something, she will literally start talking at the same time, even though she has nothing to say, just so that he can not be heard. She will use the few first words of his sentence as a platform, as above, and then just dive right off the edge of sanity, until she is hoarse. But usually it doesn’t take too long for her to get hoarse because when she starts these conversational coups, Primo goes nuts and they start yelling at each other within seconds.

“IT’S MY TURN TO TALK!” they shout simultaneously.

The prime location for this to occur is in the car, where David and I are trapped. David says it’s like being plunged into icy water. Bracing.