Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Royal Wedding

I want to personally thank Prince William and Princess Catherine for tying the knot last week because it gave me the chance to dress Primo in his Easter suit again, and to finally wear the tuxedo shirt and bow tie I bought in December from H and M for $9. Behold the cuteness:

Continuing the tradition of buying my kids stuff they don't need just because it is on super sale, last year my mother bought Primo a Calvin Klein suit, and its been hanging in the closest screaming "FIND AN OPPORTUNITY TO WEAR ME!" for months. On Easter, I put him in it, even though he was way overdressed and looked like a butler among the rest of the devoted attendees of the one Catholic church in David's Tennessee hometown. And I figured that would be the only time he wore the suit unless I found a way to score him ringbearer duties on somebody's wedding (anyone need one? he's got experience, and the suit). And then, miraculously, we got invited to a royal wedding viewing party.

At first, when I got the evite that read "William and Catherine Are Gettingt Hitched!" I responded to my friend, "Honey, you sent this to me by mistake. I don't know your friends William and Catherine." But when she enlightened me, and I read the evite which encouraged guests to wear their most royal finery and promised tea sandwiches and fish n chips, I was over the moon.

There is nothing I like to ingest more than cucumber sandwiches. Just the thought makes me salivate. In the middle of my severe, unbearable morning sickness with Primo, I remember having a few days where I desperately WANTED to eat something, and the thing I wanted to eat was cucumber sandwiches. I tried to make them but they turned out all seedy and soggy and it depressed me. I probably could've perfected my recipe except that in three days, I was back to vomiting my internal organs up. That was the last time I had cucumber sandwiches.

The party was amazing -- really, the sort of themed fete which I aspire to throw, but fall short of achieving because I lack an innate sense of design and classiness. There was tea service and Pim's. there were bangers and mash and fish n'' chips served in brown bags with newspaper underneath: "Just like they do it in London" I told Primo, though I can only presume as I've never been to England.

There were crustless cucumber sandwiches on slighty stale white bread which was heaven on earth. AND tiny egg salad sandwiches, too.

And my Martha Stewart hostess friend even made a Union Jack out of cut berries.

"I don't even have words to describe what you've achieved here tonight." I told her, "You're an inspiration."

Oh and yeah, the wedding was nice. I would've died for a veil like that when I got hitched. Also, her waistline. But my favorite part, I think, was the fact that they used the term "thou" - it was so Shakespearean. "Wilst thou, William, take Catherine?" That's classy, man. Don't think this Brooklyn girl or her rube husband could've pulled that off.